At times i have the urge to just burn something, just to see the flames dance, licking my subject and later breaking all the bonds that held it together.
Other times, i just want to sit down quietly. Left alone to my own solitude with nothing but a book or two. Sitting down enjoying the breeze with a good book. That’s the life. I feel that way because then i can actually pretend and daydream about some things that i wish to happen to me.
Its real fun just imagining how life can be and how life is. Right now i just enjoy my life with God who is opening my heart, bit by bit. Maybe i am too selfish, maybe i am too self-centred. I have no idea what to think or to say. Perhaps i need to slap myself and later dunk myself into the icy cold water at midnight. ( that sounds like fun to me)
I am a busy girl yet i have time to post, somethings wrong. hahahaha maybe i am making it my priority to write whats in my heart that i cannot express verbally. Maybe if i start being sure of what i think or say, maybe then i know the answer.
Then, when that happens, maybe i can unmask myself and see for myself who has been hiding underneath that facade. See for myself the monster/angel/something that has never been unleashed. I thank God that when it happens, i have the full knowledge that He has loved me ever since i was born, and that i have at least Him to turn to.
Maybe thats the time, i am perfectly whole.